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Showing posts from October, 2012

When I'm honest . . .

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"If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us." 1 John 1:8      It is so hard to be honest with myself. I love thinking well of myself and can be quick to judge others' insight into how my actions need correction and/or thoughtful consideration. I don't like admitting when I'm wrong and I'm quick to point out the speck in my brother's eye and ignore the plank in my own. When the Lord serves us His love in the platter of humility, it can be hard to digest. But only in honest confession can I be forgiven and heal from my pride wounds.        I was meditating/re-memorizing 1 John 1 and the first part of chapter 2 this morning. The Lord used His words to apply His truths to a situation that I'm experiencing right now. "If we say we that we have fellowship with Him, and walk in darkness [i. e. pride], we lie and do not practice the truth." (1:6), "If we say we have not sinned, we make Him a liar, and His wor

Stillness in conflict

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     Stillness - a place where conflict and comfort meet. A place where the soul can wrestle and ask the honest 'why's?' The question isn't "Why do I struggle and wrestle?" but, "Why don't I allow time for the stillness in which to do so?"      I struggle with honesty: Honesty with myself and honesty with my Creator. I bury the questions the beg to break through the surface of my soul and cry out for an answer. I don't want to deal with them. I don't want to face the dragons that are found on the battlefield that is my mind.      I struggle with inadequacy. Something must be wrong or broken with me if God is pleased to take treasured things away. I must not be worthy of the happiness that I imagine is good and right. Why is it that, so often, my comprehension of what is good and right is in conflict with my reality and a God whose goodness I don't always understand? How do I respond to this painful, loving discipline of my hea